The curser is blinking at me

I have no idea how to put it onto paper. The emotions, the stress, the uncertainty, the worry, the stress and the stress.

I have been an expat for 7 years living in Doha, Qatar, but now we are on the move. It’s been a tough few months with uncertainty hanging over us, but the mist is clearing and we are leaving. Back to the UK for Christmas and then hopefully onward and upwards to Jakarta, Indonesia.

Doha was my first time as an expat, not counting travelling in Australia (which I plan to write about in a different blog sometime). Leaving the UK to come here was no big deal and I jumped on the plane, following my boyfriend with only a little bit of information about the country I was going to make my home. Seven years later it still feels it was no big deal, even though I got married here and had two children in this country.

But now it is a big deal, we are leaving. I am leaving everything I know and it’s not just for a holiday. We are giving up our home, the school places, my job, my furniture,our cars. We are moving with all our ‘stuff’ to a country I know nothing about, but when I look for information I am so overwhelmed that I can’t read. We have to find a school, find a house, find a friend. Now it feels like a big deal. I didn’t think I would feel like this about Doha and I didn’t think that I was so settled here. Yes, it felt like home, but it was always temporary – or so I thought.